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How to choose a wedding date, with four filters in order
Most advice on picking a date is a list of things to think about. Here they are as four filters in a fixed order, so a long list of possible Saturdays turns into one date you both agree on.
The short answer
Run your candidate dates through four filters, in this order: enough time to plan (about 11 months before the venue is usual), the calendar (holidays, family dates, travel), the price (in The Knot's data, January weddings averaged $29,900 against $33,900 in May) and who is free (the venue first, then the photographer). Keep three dates alive until a venue confirms one. The venue's yes is what makes the date real.
A date feels like the first decision, and it is also the one most couples try to make in the abstract. It goes faster as a funnel: start with every date that could work, and let each filter take some away.
Filter 1: Enough time to plan
Start with how long you have. On our free checklist by date, the venue is booked about 11 months before the wedding, the caterer and the photographer about 10, and save-the-dates go out about 7 months before.
So count forward from today:
- About a year or more away: every booking happens in its usual order. Nothing to change.
- Six to eleven months away: still a full wedding, but the venue, caterer and photographer all have to be booked in the first few weeks. Our guide to planning a wedding in 6 months covers the order.
- Under six months: possible, and usually easier with a smaller guest list or a venue that has an open date.
Shorter is not worse. It just means fewer of the most popular Saturdays will still be free, which matters at filter 4.
Filter 2: The calendar
Now cross out the dates that clash. Go through your shortlist with both families' calendars open:
- Holiday weekends. A Monday holiday gives some guests an extra day to travel home. It also puts your wedding against their own plans and higher travel prices. If most guests live nearby, it is less of a gain.
- Family dates. Other weddings, due dates, graduations and anniversaries you would rather not share.
- Your own dates. Exams, busy seasons at work, and a few calm weeks after the wedding if you want a honeymoon straight away.
- Guests who travel. If a lot of them fly, a longer lead time matters more than the exact weekend. Our destination wedding timeline has the dates for that.
Ask the two or three people you could not marry without whether any of your dates is impossible for them. Do it before you visit venues, not after.
Filter 3: The price
The day and the month change the price, though less than most people expect for the wedding as a whole. The Knot's 2025 Real Weddings Study, of weddings held in 2024, gave these averages:
| When | Average wedding cost |
|---|---|
| January | $29,900 |
| November | $31,400 |
| June | $33,100 |
| October | $33,500 |
| May | $33,900 |
| Thursday | $31,100 |
| Sunday | $32,700 |
| Saturday | $33,100 |
| Friday | $33,200 |
Two things stand out. The gap from the cheapest month to the dearest is about $4,000, around 12 percent. And a Friday wedding cost about the same as a Saturday on average, so the cheaper days in this data were Thursday, Wednesday and Sunday.
These are averages across whole weddings, with different guest counts and places mixed together. The saving you will actually get comes from the venue fee and from a few vendors who price by demand. So do not choose from the table. Ask each venue on your list for the price of the same wedding on two or three of your dates, and compare those.
Free toolWedding checklist by dateEnter your date and what you have booked. Get a dated checklist and your next three things to do.Build my checklistFilter 4: Who is free
Last, availability. The venue goes first, because, as our planning guide puts it, nearly every other booking waits on it. Then the photographer and anyone else who works one wedding a day.
Send every venue the same short message with your dates in order of preference:
We are looking at Saturday 16 October, Sunday 10 October or Saturday 6 November 2027, for about 110 guests. Which of these do you have, and what would each cost?
Keep all three alive until one venue confirms in writing. If your favourite venue has none of them, decide together whether the venue or the date matters more to you. Both answers are fine, but decide it once.
A worked example
Say you got engaged this month, October 2026. You want about 110 guests, a mild day, and most of your families live within a few hours' drive. Your first list has five Saturdays: 12 June, 18 September, 9 October, 16 October and 6 November 2027.
- Planning time. 12 June is about eight months away: possible, but the venue, caterer and photographer would all need booking in the next few weeks. You would rather not rush, so it goes.
- The calendar. Your sister is getting married on 18 September, so it goes. Columbus Day (Indigenous Peoples' Day) is Monday 11 October 2027, so 9 October is a long weekend for some guests. Your families drive, so the extra day is no help, and it goes too. You add Sunday 10 October instead, the same weekend: guests with the Monday off can stay late without needing a day of leave.
- The price. You ask two venues for the fee on 16 October, 10 October and 6 November. The Sunday and the November Saturday come back lower than the October Saturday.
- Who is free. Your first choice of venue has 16 October and 6 November. Your photographer has 6 November only.
Your date is Saturday 6 November 2027. It took one evening and two days of emails, and every date you dropped has a reason you can tell your families.
Choosing together
A date is a decision you both have to live with every anniversary, so make it together. Before you open a calendar, each of you can write down the one thing about the date that matters most: a season, a meaningful day, a cheaper month, a short wait. If the two answers clash, the filters above give you a neutral order to settle it. Our guide to planning a wedding together has more on splitting decisions like this one.
Yes, I Do
A checklist built around your date
Answer a few questions and every task is dated for your wedding, so each thing lands in the month it belongs to.
What happens once you have it
When you set up Yes, I Do, you can switch the date to "Not decided yet". Your checklist then starts with choosing a date or shortlisting dates, and the other tasks wait for it. When you add the date to your wedding details, the checklist's suggested deadlines move to fit it, and any deadline you set yourself stays where you put it.
The next decisions come from the date: when the save-the-dates and invitations go out, and what to book month by month, in our wedding planning checklist.
Questions
How far in advance should you pick a wedding date?
About a year before the wedding is common, because the venue is usually booked around 11 months ahead and most other bookings wait for it. Six months is enough if you book the venue, caterer and photographer in the first few weeks.
Should you choose the venue or the date first?
Choose a shortlist of dates first, then let the venue settle it. Keep two or three dates open while you ask venues, and book whichever one your favourite venue has free. If one exact date matters more than the place, choose it first and find a venue that has it.
What is the cheapest month to get married?
In The Knot's 2025 Real Weddings Study, January weddings were the cheapest on average at $29,900, followed by December and November. May was the most expensive at $33,900. The difference for your wedding depends mostly on what your venue charges for each date.
Is it cheaper to get married on a Friday?
On average, not by much. In The Knot's data, Friday weddings averaged $33,200 and Saturdays $33,100, while Thursday ($31,100), Wednesday and Sunday came out lower. Many venues still charge a lower fee on a Friday, so ask for both prices.
What is the most popular month to get married?
October, September and June. The Knot says the most popular wedding date is usually a Saturday in one of those months, and fall has been the most popular season since 2015. Popular dates are the first to go at venues and photographers.
What dates should you avoid for a wedding?
Dates that clash with the people you most want there: family weddings, due dates and graduations. Holiday weekends can work, but they cost guests more to travel and compete with their own plans. Very short notice for guests who need to fly is the other one to avoid.
Sources
- The Knot: the cheapest month to get married, updated April 2025, with average costs by month and day of the week from The Knot 2025 Real Weddings Study.
- The Knot: the most popular wedding dates, updated May 2026, for the most popular months and seasons.
- U.S. Office of Personnel Management: federal holidays, for how Monday holidays are set and observed.